Old Milwaukee, by Oliver Brown

OLD MILWAUKEE
by Oliver Brown

My baby's under age
I just turned twenty-one
I buy her Old Milwaukee
True love has just begun

I don't drink martinis
They make me puke in the hall
I don't drink tequila
It tastes just like aerosol

I buy my baby Old Milwaukee
We turn down the lights and crank AC/DC
Don't want sushi, don't want saki
I buy my baby Old Milwaukee

I just turned twenty-one
I can buy pornography
I can go to smokey bars
Oh, but those aren't for me

I got my baby instead
She's so much better, I say
She knows me better than mom does
She knows me better than God does

I buy my baby Old Milwaukee
We turn down the lights and crank AC/DC
Don't want sushi, don't want saki
I buy my baby Old Milwaukee

I call her my fluffy little moron
She calls me the Queen
She buys me Snicker bars
I buy her Listerine

I buy my baby Old Milwaukee
We turn down the lights and crank AC/DC
Don't want sushi, don't want saki
I buy my baby Old Milwaukee

We rent Top Gun and Jabberwocky
We watch Kojak and then some hockey
Letterman sure getting cocky
I buy my baby Old Milwaukee